Unfiltered thoughts from a bisexual switch
When a dynamic ends, you always question whether there is something more you could have done to make the dynamic continue.
One of my online ones ended this morning, I knew it was likely to end, and I knew this day would eventually come, but it still hurts just a little that it can’t continue.
It was fun while it lasted, but all good things must come to an end.
Since it is a new year, I have decided to give the BDSM Test another crack for 2023. I want to see how much I have evolved over time.
Looking at the results quickly, being a switch still remains number 1 on my list. There have been some slight movements up and down the list, but I think overall the list is relatively steady.
I definitely agree with the switch rating, as I swing both ways. I’ll come back in a few months and see what happens.
| BDSM ARCHETYPE | RATING |
|---|---|
| Switch | 100% |
| Non-monogamist | 90% |
| Brat | 90% |
| Experimentalist | 86% |
| Masochist | 85% |
| Daddy/Mommy | 85% |
| Dominant | 79% |
| Sadist | 76% |
| Submissive | 76% |
| Brat tamer | 74% |
| Ageplayer | 73% |
| Boy/girl | 73% |
| Rigger | 68% |
| Voyeur | 61% |
| Vanilla | 53% |
| Primal (Hunter) | 41% |
| Primal (Prey) | 34% |
| Master/Mistress | 31% |
| Rope bunny | 31% |
| Owner | 23% |
| Degrader | 14% |
| Exhibitionist | 11% |
| Slave | 9% |
| Pet | 3% |
| Degradee | 3% |
Here’s to the next time I do the test and see how I have evolved further.
What I am about to write in this post is difficult to share. I am frustrated by a recent chain of events that happened in my list this week. I want to move on from these events and put this experience behind me. However I have a desire to write and share these thoughts.
Last wee, I spotted a post published by a transmasculine non-binary person. They are located in the same metropolitan region as I am, and they were looking for a Daddy Dom to explore a potential dynamic with.
I reached out to them to see if we could have a chat, to see if there was some common ground, and to see what might happen. The conversation flowed easily, and we realised that we could offer what we were each looking for.
I have not had many interactions with a transmasculine non-binary person before. I did my best to be respectful. I feel like I may have slipped up once or twice, I apologised and they assured me that I was doing well, and that I had the right intentions with our interactions.
During our talk, the topic of past dynamics and relationships came up. Obviously I shared my experiences of these dynamics. One particular experience I shared was about being ghosted.
As a result of some of my past interactions, I believe that it is better to be open and honest about your feelings with the other person than outright ghost them if you don’t want to continue. They said something very similar, and said they something along the lines of “I believe I would be respectful if things do not work out [between us], but obviously hope it would not come to that”.
We continued chatting, even started to arrange to catch-up in person during the break. Clearly we were both excited to be meeting a potential play partner and that became the topic of conversation for a while.
The conversation flowed well over a few days, we still talked about the upcoming catch-up. And then the following events occurred.
Late one evening, we were chatting as normal for us, we were both tired and it was getting late. We said our good nights to each other. I planned to stay up for a bit longer. As I was sitting there doing whatever I was doing, the conversation disappeared from the app we were using. I thought it was strange for a conversation to disappear. My initial thoughts were that there was a bug in the app, and I restarted the phone/app but the conversation was gone.
Given it was late I didn’t was to press the issue, and thought it could be resolved the following morning.
I remained awake and continued with my evening. However as I climbed into bed, I received a message from them using the orginal platform where we met. It said the following:
Hey. Just want to apologise. This got overwhelming very quickly and I can’t do this. I hope there is no hard feelings but I can’t meet up or continue speaking. It was my first step into attempting poly and I got scared. So, I need to focus on myself and my current relationship so I can get over these fears. Good luck with it all, and sorry again.
I can understand things being new and challenging your thoughts, but I also know that we discussed “exit strategies” for lack of a better term, and being respectful of each others feelings if things weren’t working for us.
That was not the message I was expecting at all. I thought maybe the topic of things moving too fast could come up, then we could stop & evaluate the situation, and have an adult conversation and talk about what was not working. I was hoping that there would be at least show some respect to the other person rather than just ghosting them leaving them in the dark with a vague message that was a complete 180-degree turn from where the conversation left just 2 hours earlier.
I have my suspicions as to why I was ghosted (they developed feelings they weren’t expecting to develop). I understand that non-monogamy may not be for everyone, and I can respect that.
I would have been happy to step back and let them evaluate whether they wanted to pursue the dynamic further or not. Being ghosted without an explanation just sucks, especially when things felt like they were going really well just a few hours earlier.
While I don’t need an explanation, it would be nice to receive an explanation of why would want to end things.
It is disappointing that something that felt natural and going well, and had promise for both parties, ended the way it did.
Logically I am somewhat relieved that it happened before we met in person, or at the time of the planned catch-up. However I am disappointed that it happened at all, especially we we had discussed this exact type of situation earlier on. It happened, what’s done is done, I have to move on, but it is sad that it happened.
All I can say is that for those people looking to explore non-monogamy, please be open and honest with all people involved. Do not ghost! The only reason I can see where ghosting is valid is when there is a threat to your safety.
I am not sure whether you picked up that there is a new person in my life at the moment. I will elaborate on this in the future. However, for now I am sharing a scenario that we may wish to eventually explore in the (hopefully) not too distant future.
CW: The following work of fiction may contain topics that some readers find sensitive. All persons mentioned are of legal age and able to give informed consent.
Daddy & Kitten check-in to a hotel room for the weekend. Once settled one of their rituals is Daddy running a hot bath for Kitten.
So Daddy heads to the bathroom to start running a hot bath. He heads back to his luggage & pulls out a bottle of bubble bath wash. It is Kitten’s favourite scent. He adds the bathtub to the hot bath water as Kitten gets herself ready.
When the bath is close to full, he stops the water & checks the water temperature for Kitten. He heads back to check on Kitten. She stands there, wrapped in a towel, a lock of hair wrapped around her finger as she twists it looking shyly at Daddy.
As Daddy approaches slowly, she drops the towel to reveal she is ready for her bath. Daddy leads her to the bathtub & helps her climb in carefully. She looks sad that there are no bath toys, but Daddy has a surprise for her. He has a new toy tucked away in his luggage.
He heads back to the bedroom and grabs the toy from his bag. He hands it to Kitten when he gets back to the bathroom. She beams at him with joy and splashes joyfully.
Daddy sits on the floor next to the bathtub and listens to Kitten splashing and playing with her new toy. They talk as she plays, catching each other up on their most recent events.
Soon Kitten is ready to be washed. She points to the wash cloth on the vanity and asks for Daddy to wash her.
Daddy soaps up the wash cloth and starts rubbing it all over Kitten’s back, making sure he touches every part of her back. He then moves the cloth round to her front and continues washing her body.
Daddy makes sure he washes all parts of her body, taking special care for all of Kitten’s nooks and crannies (and especially her curves). Once she is completely washed, Daddy rinses and hangs up the wash cloth and stands to grab her towel.
Kitten pulls the plug then carefully stands up. Daddy wraps a towel around his Kitten, and helps her out of the bath. He leads her to the bedroom where he dries every part of her body carefully and methodically. He then helps her get dressed. Daddy holds her pyjamas out for her to get dressed into. Kitten gets dressed and is now ready to start her weekend getaway with Daddy.
They sit on the lounge and Daddy flicks on the TV and pulls up the movie listings. Kitten picks one of her favourite movies, Tangled, and then lays on the lounge with her head in Daddy’s lap.
Daddy rests his hand on Kitten’s tummy, his thumb moving back & forth over her curves. His other hand strokes her hair as she looks up at him lovingly with a wry smile.
Kitten rolls over to face Daddy & moves her head back. She rubs her hand over Daddy’s crotch & can feel his cock slowly growing harder. Daddy continues to stroke her hair and rest his other hand on her hips.
Kitten slowly pulls down the fly on Daddy’s jeans and slides her hand inside. She grabs his now hard cock and gives it a few strokes. Daddy moans but otherwise doesn’t react.
Kitten keeps stroking as Daddy’s moans become more frequent. She reaches inside his underwear and pulls his cock out of his pants. Her eyes are drawn to it and she kisses the tip.
Daddy finally looks down smiling at Kitten. She notices and takes his cock head inside her lips. She swirls her tongue around the tip making sure to focus on the underside of the head. Daddy’s moans grow in volume and intensity.
Daddy tries to remain still, but he cannot as Kitten takes all of Daddy’s cock inside her mouth. She gags a little, and pulls back. Daddy adjusts his body to make his cock more available, he also unbuckles his belt. Kitten pulls back & positions herself kneeling at Daddy’s feet looking up at him lovingly.
Daddy stands up and lowers his jeans and underwear. Kitten helps push them to the side. As Daddy sits down again, Kitten takes his cock inside her mouth again, right to the back of her throat. She gags a little more, but eagerly continues.
They both moan as Kitten works her way up and down Daddy’s rock hard cock. She fondles his balls while continuing to suck on the cock before her. Daddy moans as an orgasm slowly builds deep inside.
He rests his hand on the back of her head saying, “You’re a very good lil kitten for Daddy. You’re making Daddy very pleased.” As Kitten heard this, she dropped into a headspace she only experiences with Daddy.
Kitten wants that sweet cum from Daddy. Kitten adores Daddy’s sweet cum both on her, and in her. She is especially fond of tasting his cum.
Kitten continues working her magic on Daddy’s cock, taking all of it in her mouth with a slight gag (which Daddy visibly enjoys), and then takes her time to tease his cock head. She continues doing this as Daddy’s moans grow louder and longer. Daddy’s orgasm continues to build.
Daddy begs Kitten to stop, but she is desperate to taste his cum. Daddy moans.
“I’m about to cum Kitten!”
She focuses her attention on Daddy’s cock head as she knows that her attention always takes him over the edge.
Her tongue teases the underside of his cock. Her mouth open to catch his cum. Daddy groans loudly.
“I’m cumming!”
He watches as Kitten opens wide in anticipation of Daddy’s cum. Two or three more strokes of Daddy’s cock, and his cum erupts from his cock head into Kittens mouth. Each stroke causes another eruption of cum.
After 4 or 5 strokes, Kitten starts licking the thin strands of cum from Daddy’s cock and her lips. She moans as she savours the warm sticky cum in her mouth before it slides down her throat as she swallows.
“Who’s a good girl swallowing all of Daddy’s cum tonight?”
“I am Daddy!”
“Yes you are my Lil Kitten Princess.”
Daddy helps Kitten stand up before kissing her. Daddy tastes the cum on her lips, but he does not care, he is deeply in love with his Kitten. They embrace in each others presence savouring the moment of the start of their weekend together.
Daddy site down on the sofa and invites Kitten to join him. She lays down on the sofa again and places her head back on Daddy’s lap. She looks up at him as he places his hands where the were earlier. The movies has been on the whole time, but neither cares, they just enjoyed a fantastic start to a much needed weekend away with each other.
TW: The following story may contain topics that some readers find sensitive. All persons mentioned are of legal age and are able to give informed consent.
Sometimes the best stories come from real life scenarios and the possibilities that may develop from the situation. This is one of those events.
I am a prolific poster on Reddit & some of the more NSFW Subreddits where people, mostly women share their bodies with many subscribers from around the world. I am using Reddit at the moment to look for a little girl as part of a Daddy Dom Little girl (DDlg) dynamic, online or in real life.
At least once per week, I post up a personals ad offering to be a Daddy for Littles online or IRL. Most people who reply are from overseas. Now and then I come across someone from the land of Australia, mostly from states other than my home state.
Today, a lovely lady who goes by the name Olivia, asked if I could answer a few questions for her about DDlg. We had a good conversation via Reddit chat, and I cleared up some of her confusions and I answered questions to the best of my continually learning knowledge-bank.
After a few more days of chatting, we agreed to meet in person. This first meeting would involve a picnic and to eliminate any expectations of how the date would end, we agreed to partake in a ‘kissing date‘.
We organised to meet at the botanic gardens for a lovely picnic of sandwiches and champagne. I made some sandwiches that morning to bring with me. I packed a picnic blanket ready for our date, as well as champagne flutes. Olivia agreed to bring her favourite champagne for us to drink.
We travelled separately to our date. I arrived first and setup the blanket for us under the shade of a large tree. I pulled out the plates, sandwiches and champagne flutes ready for the date. Olivia arrived a few minutes later and brought over the champagne for us.
We did the polite thing with a cheek kiss and sat down on the blanket. We chatted for a few minutes, we were already comfortable chatting, but being in person made things a little awkward at first, but we soon found our chatting rhythm.
I offered to open the champagne. I took the bottle, and slowly worked out the cork with the familiar pop. I poured out two glasses of champagne for us. I set the bottle down, and we celebrated our first meeting.
It was time for some food, I offered Olivia the sandwiches, and she took a few to nibble on, but I sensed the food would only be the appetiser.
Olivia put her sandwiches to the side, and she jumped on top of me pushing me to the ground. She leaned in and kissed me passionately. I returned the kiss, we just lay there for a few minutes continually kissing. I hugged Olivia and pulled her body close to mine.
We rolled over so I was on top. The kissing continued of course, and the tension was slowly building. Olivia’s hands started to wander all over my body.
Olivia reached down between us & rubbed my cock through my jeans. I ignored her advances & continued the kissing.
We positioned ourselves side by side to continue kissing each other. Our hands were enthusiastically exploring each other’s curves & crevices.
Olivia mentioned she wanted to see my pierced cock in person as she had never seen one up close. She reached down and tried to slide her hand inside my jeans. I grabbed her wrist playfully and pulled her hand out. She tried again and I pulled her wrist back out again.
We continued kissing enjoying the taste of each other’s lips. Olivia reached down again & rubbed my hardening cock through my jeans again. I moaned at her touch. I wanted her to touch it but we agreed to a kissing only date.
I rubbed her cunt through her dress and panties. I could feel her warmth and knew she was wet, but I resisted lifting her dress for a closer inspection. I really wanted to touch her cunt and taste her juices, just as she wanted to taste & feel my cock in her mouth.
The kissing subsided for a bit to catch our breath. We were both hot and horny for each other, but knew we agreed to limits. We could have changed those limits, but what would we do next time?
We finished up the last of the champagne and sandwiches sitting on the blanket just talking.
Soon the time allocated came to the close, we still wanted each other, & knew this relationship could go further than we initially thought back during those first few messages on Reddit.
We packed up & wandered back to the cars, hand in hand, giddy with excitement over what just happened and what may happen in the future.