Musings of a Switch

Unfiltered thoughts from a bisexual switch

Thoughts

Masturbation thoughts

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What do you think about when you masturbate?

Cartoon image of a man lying on his back. He is wearing a butt plug with a blue jewel. There is a cock ring around his cock and balls. He has his cock in one hand, and is dripping lubricant onto his exposed cock head with his other hand.
Cocktails and cock-stroking by Girl on the Net

This is not a question that comes to mind often. Most of the time the thoughts passing through my mind during masturbation are whatever turns me on in that moment. I have not noticed a trend of thoughts where one of them sticks out more than any others.

Most recently, my thoughts have been drawn to transwomen. The idea of sucking on their girl cock/clit really gets my thoughts flowing, and often leads me to stroking my cock until it is hard and ready to ejaculate my warm, sticky cum.

Previously I have been drawn towards women who have undergone significant weight loss and have excess skin with texture, particularly around their waist and fupa. Not really sure where those thoughts originated.

Other times it is when I am feeling submissive. Times when I want a woman to take charge of my orgasms and control them, even controlling my boy pussy. Have her peg me, even with fantasy dildos.

My mind wanders to any number of things when it comes to masturbation. They are generally drawn to my thoughts of the month and what is currently turning me on, and driving my sexual desires.

I wonder where my masturbation thoughts will lead me next.

Moving forward

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Life for the last six or so months has been a series of ups and downs. There were many high points, and many low points that followed the highs. I met new people online, a few of those I met in person, and some of those have decided to go their own way.

What I have learned from these six months is that what I am looking for in a person probably does not exist. The idea of finding a person who is:

  • looking for in person DDlg dynamic
  • open to exploring with a relatively inexperienced Daddy
  • polyamorous
  • flexible around life situations

Trying to find the quadrella within the Sydney basin seems relatively difficult. Six months of exploring has not found someone who is willing to go the distance beyond talking online.

So where to now?

It seem that the person I am looking for is a unicorn, I think I need to accept one of three things:

  1. I become more flexible in the criteria I am looking for
  2. I stop looking for the unicorn
  3. I find a new kink to explore with poly people

I don’t feel my criteria can be any more flexible without damaging my existing family. I would essentially need to have my own play space that I have access to 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and that basically means not having a family. Alternatively I stop looking for the unicorn.

Given one of them is far easier to achieve than the other, I think I really need to pick the option where I stop looking. I cannot continue looking for a needle in a haystack, especially if this needle does not appear to exist.

So from today, this switch will stop looking for the unicorn, and start learning to accept what I have been given. If the opportunity arises I might explore it, however I’m not too sure that it will arrive.

I think it might be time to farewell this chapter of Daddy Dom and put it behind me, confining it to the history of this blog. Maybe a new chapter will open in the future, but for now I think this chapter is closed.

Favourite sexual position

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What is your favourite sexual position, and why?

Cartoon image of a couple on a bed, the woman pegging the man on his back
Pegging by Girl on the Net

The number of sexual positions is astronomical. Are we just considering heteronormative positions? Gay and lesbian compatible positions? What about positions that are suitable for transgender persons?

Well for me, one position that I really enjoy, and do not participate in often enough is being on my hands and knees, my shoulders close to the bed, with a dominant woman behind me, wearing a strap on dildo, and the dildo deep inside my ass.

As much as I call myself a switch, there are certain submissive acts that I am drawn to mentally and physically. Pegging is one of them.

While I do enjoy being dominant on occasion, taking charge of another persons orgasms, I also appreciate someone taking charge of mine. Submitting to a woman, being fucked in my ass just tickles my sexual desires as needed.

So any position where I can be fucked in the ass is my favourite sexual position.

Foreplay

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What are your thoughts on foreplay? Favourite types? Best experiences? Wishes?

Everyone’s definition of foreplay varies widely. So what definition of foreplay is implied with this question? My gut says that the question is aimed at the physical aspects of foreplay, however some people, myself included, believe there is far more to foreplay than cunnilingus and blowjobs.

In my definition of foreplay, there are many aspects. A good way to describe my definition of foreplay is with a three course dinner.

As each course has a different mood behind it, each course has a different feeling about it, and I like different aspects of each course. Obviously I have a preference for one particular course over another, but that changes depending on my mood at the time.

So let me share how I see foreplay as a three course dinner.

Entrée

The first course of foreplay is all about the flirtations and teasing that comes before you get together in person. The first two bites are the flirty text messages, and teasing talk. These bites set the scene for the course.

Photo by Christian Wiediger on Unsplash

The next couple of bites are the lewd picture swapping. This certainly wets the appetite for the rest of the foreplay dinner.

This part of the foreplay meal is about building the tension between all parties involved so that all are a little on edge and looking forward to a good experience with another person in a like-minded environment.

Main course

Once the entrée is complete, the main course arrives. In my eyes the main course of the foreplay dinner starts when you and your partner are in the presence of each other.

Photo by Sabina Tone on Unsplash

That first kiss & hug is the first bite, the one that sets the scene of the main course.

After all the flirting & teasing with text & pictures as part of the entrée, to see & feel the person in your presence is an absolute delight. Now there is no need to rush through the course. It is all about taking your time to feel, to observe, and explore their body with your eyes & hands.

Slowly revealing themselves to you as you remove their clothing, inching closer and closer to the much desired skin-to-skin contact. The warmth of the body next to yours is the final bite for the main course.

Dessert

After the final bite of the main course, there is a slight pause before dessert comes out.

The final course of the foreplay dinner starts with the exploration of hands and fingers. The intimate touching and exploring starts, feeling all over each others bodies. The touching and feeling is not limited to hands and fingers alone, you can also use lips and tongues, and maybe a little teeth depending on the people involved.

I always ensure that any partner I am with really enjoys the final course of the foreplay dinner. I want any partner to have a memorable foreplay dessert.

Further thoughts

Not every time does foreplay follow the three course dinner plan, sometimes it is just the entrée and dessert, others it just mains and dessert.

While I wouldn’t pick any one of the foreplay courses over the other, my favourite part is just being in the presence of someone I love, helping them enjoy a foreplay dinner served by me.

What do you think about my foreplay dinner analogy? Does it resonate or intrigue you? Have you got another analogy for foreplay?

Awesome sex

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How do you define “awesome” sex (i.e. what makes sex better than good)?

It is hard to define awesome sex as any one particular sex act, group of sex acts to participate in. It certainly comes from more of a mindset.

However as I was talking with someone the other day, my ideas for awesome sex generally involve something along the lines of any type of scene, when communication between all parties just flows well, everyone is in the zone, everyone really enjoys themselves and the aftercare for all parties is exactly what they want and need.

It does not sound like much, but getting that combination for all people involved is very much a challenge, and becomes more difficult the more people involved. I’m not saying that it does not happen for larger group scenes, it just is more difficult to achieve.

So yes, I see awesome sex involving great communication, excellent chemistry and aftercare that all people enjoy.