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Musings of a Switch

Unfiltered thoughts from a bisexual switch

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Life is shit

21.07.2022 by William

Content Warning: This post includes references to mental illness and body hatred that may be distressing to some readers.

My life right now feels like a complete shitshow. Everything feels like it requires a massive effort to do anything.

I have a history of depression, and it runs in my family. I have sought assistance in the past to address it, and it has helped, but has not been something I have been able to move past in the long term.

I am very stubborn in my convictions and I find that change is very difficult. I suspect this is one reason I relapse towards depression after months of dealing with it.

I have a weird mental process when it comes to getting help for myself. If there is a medical solution to my problem, I will actively seek assistance from a professional. However when it comes to my mental health and weight loss, I want nothing to do with professional assistance.

There is some weird and convoluted mental gymnastics to get medical help for some medical conditions that can be helped with modern medicine, but not for others. I know that help is available for me, but I cannot bring myself to accept the help because I consider it cheating.

So I refuse the help out of stubbornness of not wanting to cheat, but at the same time I do not have the will power to make the required changes myself.

So I find myself stuck in this holding pattern of life, wanting to have change, but not wanting to make the changes required to help myself.

For now, life is shit, and I’m complaining about it on my blog because I can. There is no reason for you to comment on this telling me that “You can change if you want it” and “You just need the right conditions to change” because I have not found either of those in over 15 years.

Filed Under: Life Tagged With: depression, mental health, weight loss

Three months

18.07.2022 by William

I have not written about my Prince Albert piercing for two months now. There has not been much to write about as it has been mostly uneventful.

Three months after getting the piercing, I am certain that the piercing is now healed & I am now wanting to explore increasing the piercing gauge. Online research I have done has conflicting information about the duration to be spent at each gauge.

I have read that some pierced guys are able to gauge up every 6 to 8 weeks. Others have suggested waiting 6 months between gauge changes. What I find interesting is that these differences are not just from people’s experiences, but also coming from experienced piercers.

Personally I have no experience in gauging up, however I am looking to gauge up in the future. How large I am yet to decide, but for now a 4G ring is a reasonable target.

However between the 12G that I have now, and the 4G that I would like to reach, there are 4 gauge steps. Based on 6 months between changes, that will be 2 yrs away at the earliest. If I go with 3 months, it is 12 months away.

I think I am ready to gauge up now. Do I attempt to do it myself? Or do I go see the piercer? Is 3 months enough, or do I wait the 6?

I think it may be time to talk with Mike again. Ask him for his advice and find out whether we can gauge up after 3 months, and whether he has the right sized jewellery in stock for this weekend, maybe.

Filed Under: Thoughts Tagged With: penis, piercing, prince albert

Elust #151

17.07.2022 by William

Image courtesy of mywildlens. Rope and Photography by Honey at HappyComeLucky.

Congratulations @MiladyGoddess for winning the monthly Elust Contest for June!

Hope you enjoy your £50 Libidex voucher.


Elust is the only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month.

Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions, it’ll be here at Elust.

Want to be included in Elust #152? Send in a post anytime and I’ll add it to the next edition.


Product Reviews

  • The Best Sex Machine – Top 12 Vibrating, Thrusting and Riding Sexual Machines
  • TOY TEST – WildOne Silicone Buttplug Set
  • Review: Magic Wand Mini

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

  • Ten years: Who’s Counting?
  • These are a few of my favourite things…

Sex Work

  • Pegging and Deepthroat. Spitroast Duo with Mistress Charlotte
  • Whore History with Old Pros: Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera

Sex News, Opinion, Interviews, Politics & Humor

  • External Safety, Internal Story, Always Horny

Erotic Fiction

  • The Deckhand
  • Moon Feather: Part 46: Strapped for War
  • On a Mystery Date with a Stranger: The Mystery Unraveled
  • The Old Barn Part Four
  • I wrote a smutty story about consensual sex!

Erotic Non Fiction

  • SUFFERING

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

  • 3 Potent Listening Skills for Kinksters
  • Money, Money, Money

Filed Under: Blog Prompts Tagged With: elust

Kissing date

14.07.2022 by William

TW: The following story may contain topics that some readers find sensitive. All persons mentioned are of legal age and are able to give informed consent.

Sometimes the best stories come from real life scenarios and the possibilities that may develop from the situation. This is one of those events.

I am a prolific poster on Reddit & some of the more NSFW Subreddits where people, mostly women share their bodies with many subscribers from around the world. I am using Reddit at the moment to look for a little girl as part of a Daddy Dom Little girl (DDlg) dynamic, online or in real life.

At least once per week, I post up a personals ad offering to be a Daddy for Littles online or IRL. Most people who reply are from overseas. Now and then I come across someone from the land of Australia, mostly from states other than my home state.

Today, a lovely lady who goes by the name Olivia, asked if I could answer a few questions for her about DDlg. We had a good conversation via Reddit chat, and I cleared up some of her confusions and I answered questions to the best of my continually learning knowledge-bank.

After a few more days of chatting, we agreed to meet in person. This first meeting would involve a picnic and to eliminate any expectations of how the date would end, we agreed to partake in a ‘kissing date‘.

We organised to meet at the botanic gardens for a lovely picnic of sandwiches and champagne. I made some sandwiches that morning to bring with me. I packed a picnic blanket ready for our date, as well as champagne flutes. Olivia agreed to bring her favourite champagne for us to drink.

We travelled separately to our date. I arrived first and setup the blanket for us under the shade of a large tree. I pulled out the plates, sandwiches and champagne flutes ready for the date. Olivia arrived a few minutes later and brought over the champagne for us.

We did the polite thing with a cheek kiss and sat down on the blanket. We chatted for a few minutes, we were already comfortable chatting, but being in person made things a little awkward at first, but we soon found our chatting rhythm.

I offered to open the champagne. I took the bottle, and slowly worked out the cork with the familiar pop. I poured out two glasses of champagne for us. I set the bottle down, and we celebrated our first meeting.

It was time for some food, I offered Olivia the sandwiches, and she took a few to nibble on, but I sensed the food would only be the appetiser.

Olivia put her sandwiches to the side, and she jumped on top of me pushing me to the ground. She leaned in and kissed me passionately. I returned the kiss, we just lay there for a few minutes continually kissing. I hugged Olivia and pulled her body close to mine.

We rolled over so I was on top. The kissing continued of course, and the tension was slowly building. Olivia’s hands started to wander all over my body.

Olivia reached down between us & rubbed my cock through my jeans. I ignored her advances & continued the kissing.

We positioned ourselves side by side to continue kissing each other. Our hands were enthusiastically exploring each other’s curves & crevices.

Olivia mentioned she wanted to see my pierced cock in person as she had never seen one up close. She reached down and tried to slide her hand inside my jeans. I grabbed her wrist playfully and pulled her hand out. She tried again and I pulled her wrist back out again.

We continued kissing enjoying the taste of each other’s lips. Olivia reached down again & rubbed my hardening cock through my jeans again. I moaned at her touch. I wanted her to touch it but we agreed to a kissing only date.

I rubbed her cunt through her dress and panties. I could feel her warmth and knew she was wet, but I resisted lifting her dress for a closer inspection. I really wanted to touch her cunt and taste her juices, just as she wanted to taste & feel my cock in her mouth.

The kissing subsided for a bit to catch our breath. We were both hot and horny for each other, but knew we agreed to limits. We could have changed those limits, but what would we do next time?

We finished up the last of the champagne and sandwiches sitting on the blanket just talking.

Soon the time allocated came to the close, we still wanted each other, & knew this relationship could go further than we initially thought back during those first few messages on Reddit.

We packed up & wandered back to the cars, hand in hand, giddy with excitement over what just happened and what may happen in the future.

Filed Under: Kinks, Writing Tagged With: daddy dom little girl, little

The deckhand

10.07.2022 by William

I have written this piece of fiction based on the perspective of the Traveller or Second Mate of Gemma & Jake’s six-month sailing adventure during 2021. I hope you enjoy.

For a number of weeks, I have been talking & messaging Gemma & Jake after discovering their sailing adventures on Twitter & admiring the many views of Gemma’s gorgeous breasts. They are making their way up the coast towards my home town and will be passing through in a few days.

Being a fan of sailing for some time, but never game to pull the plug on buying a yacht for myself, I asked whether I could come aboard. My request includes an offer to be a deckhand and chef for a few days.

After another day or so of conversation, Gemma & Jake agree. I pack my bag ready for boarding, and gather a few supplies to bring with me on the trip.

On the day of boarding, I eagerly awaited their arrival at the jetty. My heart raced as I waited, not knowing what to expect. Would they appreciate my company & cooking? Would I rub them the wrong way with my personality? Who knows, but we will only find out by meeting them in person.

I see a yacht approaching the jetty, could it be Gemma & Jake? I check my phone to see a message saying they are just a few minutes away & will be arriving shortly. It must be them, I tell myself.

A few minutes pass by and a yacht pulls up alongside the jetty. A body shape I recognise as Gemma is at the helm as Jake is tying some fenders to the port side to protect the yacht from the jetty.

I stand up from the bench I am sitting on, and offer to tie down one of the lines Jake throws to moor the yacht to the jetty. I need to make a good impression to start upon meeting Gemma & Jake.

Once moored, Gemma & Jake jumped onto the jetty & I introduce myself as William. I can not help but admire the tan’s and bodies of both of them. Dirty thoughts cross my mind of how their bodies look without clothes, but introductions are warranted first.

After some introductions, Gemma & Jake climb aboard their yacht, and Jake assists with my bag & box of supplies they had requested I bring along.

I assist with casting off from the jetty before jumping aboard for an exciting adventure with Gemma & Jake.

The adventure starts with a few hours of afternoon sailing. I assist Jake as best I can on an unfamiliar yacht. I help adjusting the sails to the wind conditions, pouring the occasional drinks for everyone, and making sure everyone has the necessary food in their hands.

The conversation easily flows throughout the afternoon. Jake navigates us to one of the sheltered moorings along the coast. We moor for the afternoon & evening.

After readying the yacht for the weather conditions, I opt for a swim in the crystal blue waters. Gemma opts for some nude sunbathing on deck & Jake reads the book he is currently working through.

I hop back on the yacht and head towards the deck where Gemma & Jake are. I sit down next to Gemma and lean in to whisper in her ear, “I’m loving your gorgeous bodies in the sun. Do you mind if I nude up?”

Now I don’t get nude in front of strangers (unless they consent of course). I only nude up for people on the internet, or my partner at the time. However today I wanted to give it a go on a yacht.

Gemma tells me it is fine, so I take off my board shorts and lay back under the sun. My mind wanders for a bit, wondering how Jake’s cock looks like both hard & soft, and how Gemma’s pussy looks & tastes.

These thoughts give me a slightly hard cock & I blurt out, “What are you two like in the bedroom? Do you guys go off?”

Gemma & Jake lift their heads quickly and look at me quizzically as if I said something awkward. Clearly I did, but clearly my small brain is doing all the thinking at the moment.

I apologise for my outburst.

Gemma’s quizzical face turns into a wry smile & she looks at Jake. She whispers into his ear and soon reaches into his shorts while kissing him. It feels like something will soon be happening with the three of us.

After what feels like an eternity of Gemma & Jake kissing & touching each other, Jake removes his shorts and I get to witness his glorious cock first hand. Gemma has it standing to attention.

Jake motions for me to join them. I kneel at their feet just watching. I comment how gorgeous they both look under the afternoon sun. I also comment about Jake’s cock, and ask if I can touch & suck on it.

Jake looks hesitant, but allows me to touch his cock. I caress it while Gemma distracts him. His hard cock leaks a little precum & I rub it over his cock head.

I lean further in, taking just his cock head into my mouth. His precum tastes wonderful. I take his cock a little deeper into my mouth. Jake doesn’t push me away, so I continue working his cock with my hands & mouth. A few moans escape his lips as I pay special attention to the underside of his cock head.

I pull back, & turn my attention to Gemma. I spread her legs to reveal her mound and lips. I lean forward & take a deep breath, the sea air mixes with Gemma’s scent. I drag my fingers along her slit & through the hair on her mound.

After spending some time teasing & twirling my fingers on her, I lean in closer to taste her. My tongue parts her lips & taste Gemma. She tastes as good as she smells. I lap my tongue on her pussy lips, getting her juices all over my face.

I reach up with one hand, my fingers find a breast and I squeeze gently. I am unsure how sensitive her nipples are. I pull back and watch Jake playing with Gemma’s nipple. I take a mental note for next time.

Since this is my first time with Gemma & Jake, I am not sure what will happen next. I kneel watching them under the glow of the sun.

Gemma & Jake stop kissing. Gemma kneels & has me lie back on the deck. She gets between my legs and takes my cock in her mouth. Jake lays nearby stroking his cock keeping himself hard while watching as Gemma expertly sucks my cock.

This continues for a few minutes. I can feel a deep urge rising within the group.

Gemma stops sucking my cock, and positions herself above my waist. She squats down, grabs my cock, & rubs my cock along her pussy lips.

She positions my cock & squats deeper onto my cock. She gasps at the feeling of my cock entering her pussy. Jake smiles as he watches on.

I look at Jake making sure he is comfortable with the current situation. He continues stroking his cock with a smile on his face.

I motion for him to bring his cock towards my face. I want to feel both of them inside & on me.

I ask him to position himself so I can continue sucking his hard cock. He feels awkward about it, but agrees to let me continue.

The three of us enjoy ourselves on the deck, Gemma riding my cock, as I am sucking Jake’s hard cock. I feel as though this could last for hours.

Gemma leans forward and pulls Jake’s cock from my mouth and starts sucking it herself. I am enjoying this moment of being with two lovely bodies, fucking on a yacht. I offer to let Gemma use Jake’s cock, but she says that she is enjoying my cock right now.

Jake allows Gemma to continue riding my cock. I take Jake’s cock back and get Jake close to an orgasm. I can feel him twitching. I ask Gemma where we should have Jake cum. She tells me to have him cum on my chest. I continue working Jake’s cock until he cums on my chest. I drain every last drop of cum from his cock on my chest.

Jake sits back, relaxed and empty as he watches Gemma continue riding my cock.

Gemma rides my cock harder & faster, I feel her vagina squeezing against my cock. Her orgasm is building. I reach up and grab Gemma’s breasts. I lightly pinch her nipples as Jake was doing earlier.

Gemma moans as she continues to ride my cock. Her body tenses & she squeezes my cock. One last nipple pinch and Gemma’s orgasm releases. Her moans racing across the calm water. She bobs a few more times on my cock before collapsing on the deck beside me.

The three of us lay on the deck basking in the setting sunlight. Each of us content with how the afternoon unfolded.

Gemma looks at me asking whether I want an orgasm. I politely decline saying, “My orgasm comes from seeing you guys enjoying yourselves. I’m sure there will be more sexual exploring over the next few days.”

With the sun slowly descending, my stomach growls. I stand up & offer to start dinner preparations. However Jake’s sticky cum is still on my chest, and what better way than a quick swim to rinse off.

I dive off the yacht for a quick dip, Gemma & Jake follow behind me. I splash them playfully before climbing aboard, drying myself & putting on a shirt & board shorts readying myself before I start preparing dinner.

Gemma & Jake follow me shortly after offering me a drink to celebrate our first night aboard the yacht.

Filed Under: Blog Prompts, Writing Tagged With: bisexual, cock sucking, cunnilingus, erotic-fiction, mmm-mondays, non-monogamy

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